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[mttbrandlegs]

[Whatever Mettaton had been doing, he becomes completely silent at that point.

Part of him is...jealous? That Asriel had been given that opportunity. But another part of him feels sympathy for the young boss monster. Because killing is one of the hardest things a monster could do.

He would know. He's been killing for days. He'd killed for weeks prior to this.

So he walks out of the kitchen, abandoning the soup he had been making even as the microwave beeped to indicate it was done heating up--had he really been thinking about this for a minute?--and moving to Asriel's side. Seeing the kid hanging half off the couch, Mettaton gently rights him, then sits next to him again.

He can't look Asriel in the eye as he speaks.]

He deserved it, you know. He deserved to die. But...I am very sorry that you had to be the one to do such a deed.

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[It doesn't matter if Mettaton is looking at him or not, Asriel rests his head on top of his paws and stares at the floor. His breath hitches painfully, and he blinks tears that are starting to form in his eyes.]

I-I didn't... I didn't mean...

[No, he did. Didn't he? He told Mettaton as much, that he was going to kill his owner.]

He grabbed my disk, and I just - I grabbed it away from him and I just-

[It was hard to breathe. Why was it hard to breathe?]

I couldn't stop.

[mttbrandlegs]

[This, Mettaton knows about.

This...he still doesn't know how to fully deal with, but he does know that when he's upset, he wants to be supported. So without any hesitation, he wraps his arms around Asriel, the joints in them creaking and jerky, but ultimately he's successful.]

He threatened your life, Asriel. You cannot be expected to do anything but fight back. You succeeded in protecting yourself from danger and eliminating a grievous threat.

You shouldn't have stopped. Whether you meant to or not, you were protecting yourself. And that is never wrong. Do you understand this?

You are not wrong for what you did.

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[Asriel tries to curl against him, tries to bury his face. There's a brief hiss of pain as he tries to shift himself. It'd be tempting if right now, he could just give into his exhaustion. Mettaton was as close to security and safety as Asriel was gonna get.

... Which was so selfish. Mettaton was hurt too, but maybe they could just lay here and be hurt. That'd... that'd be a little better, wouldn't it?

Asriel bites his lower lip, shaking his head a little. It was wrong because Chara saw, it was wrong because of how he did it, what kind of awful, broken creature he's turned into-]

I'm not sorry.

I...

He died so quick. It was over so fast, and I... I don't feel any better for it. He wasn't sorry for any of it. [Because there's a lot of Floweys out there, aren't there, Asriel?] I-I knew he wasn't going to be, but I... I wanted him to feel something. A-and...

[Now he's just a bloody lump somewhere on the Outpost. All of his fears, his deepest nightmares, reduced to just a lump of meat somewhere out in space.]

I'm sorry. You got hurt too, and I'm just...

[There's a very faint glow as Asriel is pressed up against Mettaton's chest. It's an attempt at healing magic - something that Asriel's never attempted before. He's not even sure if he can manage anything, if he doesn't know how to use it.

He probably shouldn't be using up magic in the state he's in.]

[mttbrandlegs]

Of course he wasn't sorry for it, none of them will ever be--

[Mettaton pauses, because he can tell that Asriel is trying to heal him, and...well, there's very little to heal. Everything's external damage that'll take more than magic to fix. Still, it does help in a small way.

But Mettaton won't let the boy use his magic in vain. He too begins to try and heal Asriel, and whether it's age, determination to do so, experience, or something else, his magic is stronger. He makes it stronger.]

You were hurt worse. Please, don't expend your energy on my account, sweetheart. I'll be alright. You need to focus on yourself.

And you know what? I know that you are sorry, Asriel. That means you have a heart and SOUL in you. With good. Bad people like the ones who owned us are incapable of feeling. I feel sorry for them.

[A little white lie, but it's for the best that he keep his murderous thoughts to himself. He's done enough harm...]

cw gore

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[He wishes that were easier to believe. Honestly, he's not sorry that his owner died. Just... he can't get that image out of his head anymore. The way his owner's lifeless eyes stared right through him, even though his head was dangling by just a few strings. His hands sliced off and laying beside him. It wasn't the kind of satisfaction he wanted.

It's not like he's never killed anyone before. This... shouldn't bother him as much as it does. Why does it bother him as much as it does? It's over, isn't it?

(It didn't feel like it was over. It didn't erase muzzles, collars, and dark cells. It never would.)

Asriel stops trying to use healing magic when Mettaton tells him to, and the healing he receives in return helps soothe some of his pain. Warm healing magic to help close painful, open wounds.]

... I wanted him to regret it.

[But he didn't. He never would now. Asriel would never really stop being an "escaped slave".]

I was so scared though... I really thought I was going to lose all of you.

[mttbrandlegs]

[Mettaton's grip around Asriel tightens. He's struggling himself...it's hard to do this when he's still utterly shaken from his own experiences. It's not as if he wanted to be captured and forced to kill again.

Honestly...he wanted someone to tell him it was alright even if it wasn't. To hold him while he fell apart and began to cry about his situation and scream how unfair it was.

But he can't. He's the adult. He can't be weak. He can't give in.

And the more that he thinks that, the number he starts to feel. The more that feeling begins to take over, the less effective his magic becomes, so he just cuts it off after a few seconds.

He can't let Asriel see him hurt.]

I'm sorry. I'm sorry...I shouldn't have done this. I should have forced Chara away from this but I didn't push hard enough.

[He'd tried to push them before. Even when he didn't, they shredded him to bits. He was tired of it, so the effort he expended to push this idea from them was minimal. It's his fault.

His fault.

Mettaton can't stop himself from shaking.]

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[As weak and hurt as he is, he still notices when the arms holding him tight start trembling.

Asriel knew it was impossible for them to just brush this off and ignore this, not when it's defined their lives. And Mettaton apologizes and Asriel just, reaches out bandaged-covered arms to hug him too.]

's not your fault. Not you or Chara's. I'm just... I'm so glad we got to come home.

It's not gonna happen anymore, Mettaton. I'm not gonna let anyone try to take you away again.

I promise.

[mttbrandlegs]

[Mettaton smiles softly.

His arms cease to tremble, not because he feels assuaged by what Asriel says, but because he has to stop. No more weakness. No more pity from this poor child.

Be a man for once in your life, you useless robot.]

Thank you. I...truly appreciate you.

[True.]

I believe you.

[False.]

I know you won't let it happen anymore.

[False.]

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[Asriel feels so helpless. They'd all be so much happier, so much happier if he just never came back after turning to dust in a sad, lonely garden.

Mettaton's words barely reach him, but...]

I love you, Mettaton.

[Because even if he'll never be strong enough to protect him, he at least as to know.]

[mttbrandlegs]

I love you too, Asriel.

[That...was the god-honest truth. He loves this small goat like they're family. At this point, they are family, are't they?]

But...

[He reluctantly parts from the young boss monster.]

I think you might feel better if you're home. Your siblings must be concerned...I should not have spurred you to walk over here.

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...

Can I sleep here for a little bit?

[His injuries may not be as bad now, but he's exhausted himself from being on that planet.

And... maybe he wants a little more reassurance that his family isn't going to vanish.]

[mttbrandlegs]

[Mettaton hesitates. It's a long, bated moment where he considers the question posed...but that would never have affected the answer. Never.]

Of course you can. Let me find you some proper bed things, shall I?

[And he smiles. He smiles as if everything is fine, even if it's not. This is just another sleepover, right?]

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[Asriel forces a weak smile back and nods, but... it really doesn't feel right, does it?

His fault. He can't ever forget. He made his family suffer, and he has to do whatever he needs to do to fix it.

He wishes he knew how to fix it.

By the time Mettaton goes looking for bedding and comes back, Asriel's already drifted off into a dreamless sleep on his couch.]