[As rocky as his relationship felt with Chara right now, and how uncertain he felt about saying or doing the wrong thing around them (though getting them killed in the first place probably ruined all that... haha), Asriel did want some kind of peace between the two of them.
... Maybe he really was being selfish, wanting them to get along when they didn't want to. Asriel was afraid of losing Chara again, but he was scared of losing Mettaton too. And he didn't want to have to go behind anyone's backs just to see him.]
I appreciate it, I really do. But... um, you shouldn't have to do it all by yourself. Maybe if I talk to Chara about you instead, they'll um...
[Probably think that Mettaton is using Asriel against them.]
... Hnnn, on second thought I'm not sure if that'll work either.
[Mettaton laughs humorlessly. He didn't need to be a mind reader to know what Asriel was thinking, especially considering the conversation he just had to weave through.]
I agree, best not bring it up to them. I'll find my own way of earning their trust, I assure you.
[He says, without really being assured himself. Progress was progress though!]
Sometimes I do wish things would turn out much simpler. It wouldn't be us if it was simple though, would it?
[Asriel lets out a little laugh of his own, relaxing a little. There was so much about Chara's return that Asriel didn't understand, but he did understand their need for space. Even if it did hurt a little, he wasn't going to take that from them.
The least he could do for robbing them of their life, right?]
I wish things were a lot simpler too.
[He bows his head a little, the image of a warm fire and a family sharing stories and eating pie slices enters his mind for a few seconds.]
I think they used to be? A long time ago, I mean. It sure as heck hasn't been simple ever since we've been on that ship.
[Maybe...? It felt like the Caducan invasion and the Outpost ruined everything.]
No, it hasn't. The ship's only complicated things. Still, it wasn't the worst place compared to...several alternatives.
[Del Pascia. The Outpost. The strange eternal party planet. All of it was terrible, and then you throw in the Caducan invasion which easily destroyed the monster population on the ship...
Mettaton doesn't want to think about any of that.]
I hope very much that we are able to find a functioning Ingress that doesn't take our magic but does send us home. Then things can go...
[What? Back to normal? Yeah right...he can never go back to normal, not after all of this.]
[Back where they should be. Without thinking about it, Asriel presses a hand against his chest. Where his SOUL should be - the one he feels so protective of right now.]
Ha ha, I never thought I'd say this... but I'm pretty sick of space. It'd be nice if we could just go someplace... well, nice. You know?
We keep picking out some pretty rotten planets to visit.
[Mettaton sounds a little irate at that, but the he seeks out a positive from it.]
We're at the Midway Hub though, aren't we? That should mean the journey is soon to end! No more rotten planets, no more accidents, no more death. None of that. We are closer now to going back than ever before!
[In his head, the list of bad things...is very different.
Because if they go home, nothing will be the same. How could it be?
He won't be close to Papyrus anymore. Everything will be set back to zero, except that Asriel's coming back this time.
Is that...really enough to go back home, do shows, and pretend nothing happened?]
Haha, yeah! It's almost over now, we won't have to worry about visiting anymore bad planets!
[Asriel laughs a little nervously. He wants to go, he has a SOUL so that means he can see his family again and not have to worry about turning back into a murderous plant again. But much like Mettaton, Asriel wonders if he'll truly be able to enjoy living on the surface. After all he's been through here, and everything he's done back home.
...Well. That's what I want to say, but it's...not going to be alright, is it? I don't know if I'll be jumping back into touring, at least.
[Honesty's the best policy. Though if he was ever half as honest with Asriel even a quarter of the time...it would probably be overwhelming. They both have problems and Mettaton's aren't the worst around. It took a lot, but he's finally putting others before himself.
[Asriel wishes he could offer some kind of encouragement, maybe some kind of optimism in this kind of situation? He wants Mettaton to perform and do the things that make him happy, and Asriel wants to live on the surface with his family, living the kind of carefree life he's only talked about with Chara.
But things were too different. Scars were too deep. They could cover it up as best as they could, but there was no forgetting what's happened out here.]
... What do you think we're gonna tell everyone when we go home? Should we even tell them the truth?
I wouldn't want to, but truthfully, I don't think I could hide it.
[He chuckles, even though it's not funny.]
I've hidden quite a lot about myself from others, but after seeing everything I have here, it will be difficult forgetting it all and pretending everything is alright. And I don't think I should be expected to forget.
[The only ones that really know what Asriel's been put through is Mettaton, and to a lesser degree Papyrus. It always came back to that planet, didn't it? Every nightmare, every twitch he makes when he hears a loud sound, the way he finds himself growling when he eats or pressing his hands protectively over his ears.
He never told Frisk what he saw. Not Frisk, not Toriel, not Sans either. Especially not Chara.
He doesn't think he can stand the looks on their faces.]
... I don't want to. I can't go back to being my old self, but I can't...
[He shouldn't feel ashamed. It wasn't his fault. But it was humiliating and painful and he doesn't want to feel like that ever again.]
It's just gonna be those looks again like... like they just pity us and I don't want it.
[Mettaton shakes his head, not to say Asriel's wrong, but...]
I'll be there with you. If you don't want to see their faces, then look to mine. Look to Frisk's, or Chara's. Hah...I'm certain that Chara will find a way to avert their eyes for you, hmm?
[With a knife, he's sure. But that's beyond the point.]
We don't have to go back and pretend it's okay. Instead, let's focus on finding a way to heal. If we take it slowly, it will be manageable...
[It's not just their faces. It's how they'll act around him. Asriel already knows he acts weird. He doesn't act like how he's supposed to act. He'd be going back to a world where he never revealed anything about Flowey to any of them, where he'd have to start all over...
Asriel reaches forward and tries to take Mettaton's hand. It was something he felt like he did too often, but it was comforting to have him here. He didn't have to pretend or act like anything was okay, because it wasn't.
It never would be.]
Mmm. Okay... we'll tell them together. I think I'd feel better telling them with you there anyway.
[He doesn't mind that Asriel reaches for his hand, not at all. Mettaton also yearns for physical contact, little that he can benefit from it through actually feeling. He just likes being close to people, ghost or not. He...needs that.
So he would never begrudge Asriel a friend's touch.]
You know I will always be there for you, Asriel. Whatever you need of me, just ask. That is what friends are for, right?
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Date: 2017-01-15 08:50 am (UTC)... Maybe he really was being selfish, wanting them to get along when they didn't want to. Asriel was afraid of losing Chara again, but he was scared of losing Mettaton too. And he didn't want to have to go behind anyone's backs just to see him.]
I appreciate it, I really do. But... um, you shouldn't have to do it all by yourself. Maybe if I talk to Chara about you instead, they'll um...
[Probably think that Mettaton is using Asriel against them.]
... Hnnn, on second thought I'm not sure if that'll work either.
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Date: 2017-01-17 07:41 am (UTC)I agree, best not bring it up to them. I'll find my own way of earning their trust, I assure you.
[He says, without really being assured himself. Progress was progress though!]
Sometimes I do wish things would turn out much simpler. It wouldn't be us if it was simple though, would it?
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Date: 2017-01-17 08:08 am (UTC)The least he could do for robbing them of their life, right?]
I wish things were a lot simpler too.
[He bows his head a little, the image of a warm fire and a family sharing stories and eating pie slices enters his mind for a few seconds.]
I think they used to be? A long time ago, I mean. It sure as heck hasn't been simple ever since we've been on that ship.
[Maybe...? It felt like the Caducan invasion and the Outpost ruined everything.]
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Date: 2017-01-17 08:17 am (UTC)[Del Pascia. The Outpost. The strange eternal party planet. All of it was terrible, and then you throw in the Caducan invasion which easily destroyed the monster population on the ship...
Mettaton doesn't want to think about any of that.]
I hope very much that we are able to find a functioning Ingress that doesn't take our magic but does send us home. Then things can go...
[What? Back to normal? Yeah right...he can never go back to normal, not after all of this.]
...Back to what they should be.
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Date: 2017-01-17 08:24 am (UTC)Ha ha, I never thought I'd say this... but I'm pretty sick of space. It'd be nice if we could just go someplace... well, nice. You know?
We keep picking out some pretty rotten planets to visit.
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Date: 2017-01-17 08:41 am (UTC)[Mettaton sounds a little irate at that, but the he seeks out a positive from it.]
We're at the Midway Hub though, aren't we? That should mean the journey is soon to end! No more rotten planets, no more accidents, no more death. None of that. We are closer now to going back than ever before!
[In his head, the list of bad things...is very different.
Because if they go home, nothing will be the same. How could it be?
He won't be close to Papyrus anymore. Everything will be set back to zero, except that Asriel's coming back this time.
Is that...really enough to go back home, do shows, and pretend nothing happened?]
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Date: 2017-01-18 05:38 am (UTC)[Asriel laughs a little nervously. He wants to go, he has a SOUL so that means he can see his family again and not have to worry about turning back into a murderous plant again. But much like Mettaton, Asriel wonders if he'll truly be able to enjoy living on the surface. After all he's been through here, and everything he's done back home.
Will Chara get to go home too?
... Would they want to?]
It's gonna be weird going back, huh?
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Date: 2017-01-18 06:57 am (UTC)...Well. That's what I want to say, but it's...not going to be alright, is it? I don't know if I'll be jumping back into touring, at least.
[Honesty's the best policy. Though if he was ever half as honest with Asriel even a quarter of the time...it would probably be overwhelming. They both have problems and Mettaton's aren't the worst around. It took a lot, but he's finally putting others before himself.
About time.]
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Date: 2017-02-05 10:15 am (UTC)But things were too different. Scars were too deep. They could cover it up as best as they could, but there was no forgetting what's happened out here.]
... What do you think we're gonna tell everyone when we go home? Should we even tell them the truth?
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Date: 2017-02-07 04:32 am (UTC)[He chuckles, even though it's not funny.]
I've hidden quite a lot about myself from others, but after seeing everything I have here, it will be difficult forgetting it all and pretending everything is alright. And I don't think I should be expected to forget.
[Nor should Asriel.]
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Date: 2017-02-07 04:55 am (UTC)He never told Frisk what he saw. Not Frisk, not Toriel, not Sans either. Especially not Chara.
He doesn't think he can stand the looks on their faces.]
... I don't want to. I can't go back to being my old self, but I can't...
[He shouldn't feel ashamed. It wasn't his fault. But it was humiliating and painful and he doesn't want to feel like that ever again.]
It's just gonna be those looks again like... like they just pity us and I don't want it.
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Date: 2017-02-07 05:03 am (UTC)I'll be there with you. If you don't want to see their faces, then look to mine. Look to Frisk's, or Chara's. Hah...I'm certain that Chara will find a way to avert their eyes for you, hmm?
[With a knife, he's sure. But that's beyond the point.]
We don't have to go back and pretend it's okay. Instead, let's focus on finding a way to heal. If we take it slowly, it will be manageable...
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Date: 2017-02-07 05:22 am (UTC)Asriel reaches forward and tries to take Mettaton's hand. It was something he felt like he did too often, but it was comforting to have him here. He didn't have to pretend or act like anything was okay, because it wasn't.
It never would be.]
Mmm. Okay... we'll tell them together. I think I'd feel better telling them with you there anyway.
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Date: 2017-02-07 05:28 am (UTC)That's the spirit!
[He doesn't mind that Asriel reaches for his hand, not at all. Mettaton also yearns for physical contact, little that he can benefit from it through actually feeling. He just likes being close to people, ghost or not. He...needs that.
So he would never begrudge Asriel a friend's touch.]
You know I will always be there for you, Asriel. Whatever you need of me, just ask. That is what friends are for, right?
no subject
Date: 2017-02-07 06:50 am (UTC)Yeah... they are.
[...]
Thanks for being my friend, Mettaton.