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[Mettaton is still facing away from Asriel as the young boss monster speaks, but the way his shoulders stiffen, and the way he shifts uncomfortably...it's clear that he's listening.

God...he wishes he could tell Asriel that there's no reason to be so down on himself.

But he can't. He'd seen too much.

And yet...]

Asriel...I. I will always comfort you when I can. I don't think you're weak. And if you ever stopped existing, I don't know that I could bear it.

[He feels the weight of the boy close to him, and it causes him to slowly turn and face Asriel. Mettaton can't cry like this of course, but he looks fit to do so. There's such a tired, agonized look on his face as he slowly reaches out to hug Asriel.]

You will always be my friend. Do not ever think otherwise, sweetheart. Even if I...say awful things, and I'm the worst monster I know. Even with all that, don't think I hate you or that I would ever want to be anything but a good friend to you.

I'm...I'm so sorry. I'm very sorry, Asriel, this is--this is what I meant, I just cannot keep from spoiling anything. I thought if we could play a game, it would be okay but every time I do something...it turns out poorly because I can't think of anything happy. Only the bad things. I am so frightened of being alone, but I can't keep positive when I'm with a friend either...

[That's okay, Asriel's got enough tears to spare for the both of them. His vision's a little blurry, but the moment Mettaton pulls him in for a hug, the tip of Asriel's snout pushes under Mettaton's chin.

Asriel knows Mettaton isn't a monster in the same way that he is, and maybe this kind of affection was weird to ghosts or robots. Without realizing it, a soft growl rumbles in the back of his throat.

Mettaton telling Asriel that they'll always stay friends causes him to shut his eyes tightly, in an attempt to stop a fresh wave of tears.]

I - I'm scared. I'm really scared. I'm scared of going home, I'm scared of this ship, I'm so scared of leaving it too.

Instead of playing games and trying to be positive, can we just... I dunno, can we just be scared right now? Because I've tried being positive and I've tried distractions but nothing works.

[If it's strange, Mettaton doesn't show it. Instead, he gently nuzzles back, a quiet shudder passing through him. When he speaks, his voice sounds quiet and vulnerable. There's no more pretense.]

I'm tired of pretending. I am scared. If nothing is going to feel alright, then at least we can admit what we need to feel.

[So yes. They can be scared together. Even if it isn't helpful, it's at least honest.]

[This was far more comforting than trying to play games or pretend that everything was all right. He didn't need any of that, he just... needed someone to be scared with him.

Asriel feels a wave of sudden exhaustion. It's probably from curling up against his friend, but he doubts he'll get any kind of actually rest.]

I'm tired of pretending too. I... I just don't want to feel like the only one who's scared.

Haha... that's a pretty selfish thing to say, huh?

I don't think so. And so what if it is?

I think you deserve to be selfish right now. The captains owe us a lot. The captains haven't...been real captains even from the get-go.

[Almost instinctively, he begins to pet the top of Asriel's hair, ruffling the fringe of fur there, his eye closing. God, he just wants to cry his soul out.]

We didn't ask for this. I didn't ask for any of it...

And you do not deserve any of it. You should not feel as if you need to shoulder the burden of saving anyone. You should be having fun, like a good child. The one I know you are.

[An uneasy smile curls his lip.]

You're good, Asriel. Whatever happened before, you are a good person. Please believe me when I say that. So much...so much of the time, I couldn't imagine picking myself up and doing anything on the ship, not if I didn't have your friendship to look forward to.

[You're good.

Just hearing that from Mettaton is enough to make Asriel want to curl up against him bawl all over again. It was hard to believe that sometimes, when he's been made to feel like he's nothing. And harder to believe, when he's killed so easily - and this time, he didn't have Flowey as an excuse.

Asriel squeezes his eyes shut, letting himself just feel Mettaton's hand on top of his head. It was comforting, and in a rare moment, Asriel feels safer.]

T-thank you. That means... that means everything, coming from you. You don't deserve any of this either.

I really hope you find the happiness you're looking for, Mettaton. I really do. And I'll support you no matter what, okay?

That is all I could ask for. Thank you so much, Asriel.

[Mettaton smiles. It's such a rare moment where he can do something good. Something right. He's glad that, even if Asriel's upset, he can manage to listen to positive words.

It's a shame that Mettaton isn't half as receptive. He pretends, of course. It's easy to slip into old habits right now, because at least his words are doing something good right now. But even as he continues to gently stroke his fingers through Asriel's hair, he can't help but be dissatisfied himself.

As expected, he'll work to hide it. Asriel doesn't need this right now. Honestly...no one does...]

[Mettaton had taken a day to really think about what had happened between him and Chara, of course. It wasn't...positive, but it wasn't negative either, so he didn't see any reason to hide it.

Honestly...he wanted to talk about it because he was still aggravated about how the conversation initially went, but...also he wanted Asriel to know that he may have gotten through this time...maybe.

Probably not, but...slight chance.

So he sent a message through the TABs to his friend, short and to the point.]

HI DARLING!!! ARE YOU BUSY? I WANTED TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT SOMETHING BUT TEXT SEEMS SO IMPERSONAL...:(

[It's probably not the first time Mettaton's splintered off from Asriel while the boy was sleeping--he couldn't sleep, and staying in one place too long made him anxious nowadays. So...this probably wasn't that weird, him wanting to meet up once morning came.

He didn't have anything better to do than be near his friend.]

[Asriel is... still a little sleepy, but the message stirs him awake.]

I'm not busy. Did you want to meet somewhere?

[There's no "please help i'm dying" message this time, so Asriel remains hopeful nothing terrible happened to Mettaton while he went off on his own.]

[...Look. Don't judge. No one was worse at humanity than Mettaton had been. Even though he still enjoyed it and would never trade the experience away for anything else! Sometimes he still wishes he could eat. Taste is such a fun thing~]

YES PLEASE! THE ENTRY POINT TO THE THIRD FLOOR WILL DO.

OR DID YOU WANT ME TO MEET YOU WHERE I LEFT YOU? I'M NOT TOO FAR FROM THERE.

No that's ok. I'll meet you on the third floor

[And Asriel's up on his feet, with his fur a little ruffled from sleeping and one of his ears flipped back so that the inside is showing. He doesn't seem to notice as he moves towards the third floor, rubbing his eyes and looking for his friend.]

Mettaton, 'r you up here?

[Mettaton glances in the direction the voice is coming from.

Oh.

Oh noooo, he woke Asriel up. Oh no, look at this poor, precious baby!!

Mettaton immediately darts closer, and without much thought to what he's doing, he begins to fuss over Asriel, gently flicking his ear back down and combing his fingers through the mess of fur.]

You could have told me you were still sleeping, sweetheart. I would have waited! I'm so sorry...

[Asriel makes a face when Mettaton starts grooming him, but he doesn't attempt to stop him. He's used to his mom brushing and patting down his fur whenever it got unruly, or flipping his ear back while reminding him not to sleep with it inside out.

While brushing his fingers through Asriel's fur, there's a spot at the base of his horns that gets a small, contented huff out of Asriel.]

I wasn't- [yawn] -asleep. What did you wanna talk about?

[Mettaton notices the content sound and takes that cue to give the spot an extra scratch, gently of course. Boss monsters were pretty endearing, weren't they?

The robot gives a soft chuckle at Asriel's insistence that he hadn't been sleeping--it's hardly believable--but then falls silent. Mmm...maybe he shouldn't have led with this. He didn't want to upset Asriel, after all.

Honesty is the best policy though.]

Mmm, well. Chara.

[The horn scratching feels nice. It reminds him a little of how itchy his horns were when they were growing in - they still did itch sometimes, but not as badly now that he had actual horns.

The mention of Chara doesn't upset Asriel, but he turns his face up at Mettaton with a worried look.]

Did something else happen?

[Mettaton nods faintly, letting his hands fall away for now.]

Yes, but...it did not go as poorly as it could have. Not very great, but...a marked improvement.

[That's not saying much, Mettaton still felt pathetic for the most part, and he'd spent a lot of time thinking about what Chara had dredged up again. And it had hurt to think of Napstablook, and of Alphys.

And yet..]

I think that I may have given them something to think about. That being said, I think I'm going to have to stop using your name in conversation with them.

[A pause.]

That is--they think I'm using you as leverage.

They thought you were using me as leverage? Why would they...

[Asriel pauses, recalling how Chara acted when Asriel first ran into them.]

... Oh right, they don't remember being on the ship and all.

[It's probably all hard for them to adjust to, and Asriel and Mettaton became friends shortly after Chara had disappeared anyway.]

Thank you for trying to talk to them. Did it... it went a little better this time?

It went as I expected it to, they feel as if i'm doing this for selfish reasons, after all.

[Here, Mettaton can't help but voice his doubts. because...well, if anyone would tell him the truth, it would be Asriel, right?]

Asriel, would you tell me if you thought I was being selfish? I don't want you to spare my feelings, I need to know if I am doing something wrong.

[Ah...he told himself he wouldn't let this get under his skin, but it still does. Is Chara right? Is he just trying to be friendly with them for his own benefit?]

I don't want to use you to manipulate anyone. All I want is for us to all be able to tolerate each other, but if I am doing this incorrectly, I need to be told so that I don't...make the same mistakes with you or anyone else as I've made with...others.

You're not selfish.

[And if Mettaton is being selfish? That meant Asriel was too. Part of him really feared the idea that he'd be gone one day, or decide that he really did hate Asriel for all the awful things he's done. Thoughts like that, it really scared Asriel sometimes.

And he was so awful to Frisk, the whole time thinking it was Chara...

But they've both changed, haven't they?]

A selfish person wouldn't have pulled my SOUL out to keep me from doing something really dumb. I just... I wish Chara could see that too.

[Then again, Chara doesn't know. Asriel really should go talk to them. A childish part of him is afraid of making them hate him.]

I could have been nicer about it, granted. But...you see, that is what I wish I could use as proof to Chara. I just never get the chance, because their words are hardly the kindest. It's disarming, even for someone like me.

[He says it as if it's so hard lately, to cut deep and make him doubt himself. He doubted himself almost all the time nowadays, and he couldn't fool himself into thinking this would be different.

Mettaton sighs.]

I care about you a great deal, honey. Enough that I thought it very much worth the effort to try and parley with your sibling. I'm sure that if I keep trying, eventually something will work out. Giving up will do me no good.

[Deep down, he wants to give up, because everytime he speaks to Chara, it takes a toll. But if it's for this friendship, it's worth the pain.]

[As rocky as his relationship felt with Chara right now, and how uncertain he felt about saying or doing the wrong thing around them (though getting them killed in the first place probably ruined all that... haha), Asriel did want some kind of peace between the two of them.

... Maybe he really was being selfish, wanting them to get along when they didn't want to. Asriel was afraid of losing Chara again, but he was scared of losing Mettaton too. And he didn't want to have to go behind anyone's backs just to see him.]

I appreciate it, I really do. But... um, you shouldn't have to do it all by yourself. Maybe if I talk to Chara about you instead, they'll um...

[Probably think that Mettaton is using Asriel against them.]

... Hnnn, on second thought I'm not sure if that'll work either.

[Mettaton laughs humorlessly. He didn't need to be a mind reader to know what Asriel was thinking, especially considering the conversation he just had to weave through.]

I agree, best not bring it up to them. I'll find my own way of earning their trust, I assure you.

[He says, without really being assured himself. Progress was progress though!]

Sometimes I do wish things would turn out much simpler. It wouldn't be us if it was simple though, would it?

[Asriel lets out a little laugh of his own, relaxing a little. There was so much about Chara's return that Asriel didn't understand, but he did understand their need for space. Even if it did hurt a little, he wasn't going to take that from them.

The least he could do for robbing them of their life, right?]

I wish things were a lot simpler too.

[He bows his head a little, the image of a warm fire and a family sharing stories and eating pie slices enters his mind for a few seconds.]

I think they used to be? A long time ago, I mean. It sure as heck hasn't been simple ever since we've been on that ship.

[Maybe...? It felt like the Caducan invasion and the Outpost ruined everything.]

No, it hasn't. The ship's only complicated things. Still, it wasn't the worst place compared to...several alternatives.

[Del Pascia. The Outpost. The strange eternal party planet. All of it was terrible, and then you throw in the Caducan invasion which easily destroyed the monster population on the ship...

Mettaton doesn't want to think about any of that.]

I hope very much that we are able to find a functioning Ingress that doesn't take our magic but does send us home. Then things can go...

[What? Back to normal? Yeah right...he can never go back to normal, not after all of this.]

...Back to what they should be.

[Back where they should be. Without thinking about it, Asriel presses a hand against his chest. Where his SOUL should be - the one he feels so protective of right now.]

Ha ha, I never thought I'd say this... but I'm pretty sick of space. It'd be nice if we could just go someplace... well, nice. You know?

We keep picking out some pretty rotten planets to visit.

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Jan 5th, after speaking with Chara

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