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Crying won't bring anyone back.

[Mettaton sounded like someone who had already been crying. And he had, long before he texted anyone about this.

He didn't want to cry anymore because no matter how hard he cried and no matter how many tears stained the floor, he wasn't going to be able to will Bucky back into this city.]

The least that could have been done...is if someone's going to leave, if they care about me at all, then they can take me too.

It won't, but...

[Asriel's chest tightens as Mettaton continues talking. "If they care about me at all, then they can take me too."]

Do you want to leave?

Of course I do. Don't you?

[Mettaton shakes his head, and it's all he can do to stop himself from laughing at the fact that Asriel would think any different.]

Everyone's going to leave. Through the Ingress, or through their own doing. They'll always leave. And I...I'm going to end up alone. Haha.

No Alphys. No Papyrus. No Lucio. No Bucky.

[His voice breaks on the final name, because it's still fresh, still painful.]

Soon...there won't be any you either.

Just me. Because I cannot be freed. I don't deserve to be. Murderer. Hypocrite. My poor family...can't even depend on me.

[Of course he does. But where would he even go? Where could any of them go?]

Of course I do.

[But there's no place for monsters like us, is what wants to say. But that his own, inner, ugly thoughts and he knows it won't help Mettaton.]

But I'm not going anywhere. We're not going anywhere. If we're stuck... then we're stuck together.

No one else is going to disappear.

[Mettaton thinks to say something cruel. He considers telling Asriel that this is not the first time he has heard such things, and that it doesn't pay to be so disingenuous about the entire thing. He thinks to tell Asriel that nothing will improve, and that what they'd just all gone through had all but proved it.

He wanted to tell Asriel how much it truly destroyed any of his improvement to have the collar around his neck again and stealing his sense of individuality. Or that the gaping slash across his throat wasn't from anyone else; he had done it to himself.

Instead, he just goes quiet, nods faintly before leaning back on his sofa and closing his eye.]

I'm sorry.

[Even as Asriel says it, he knows he can't make Mettaton believe it. Not when he doesn't really believe it himself. All he can say are just empty words, empty promises... the true reality of this world, it was always kill or be killed.

Chara shouldn't have gone, because now Chara realizes what the Outpost truly was. And they were taken from him by the Savrii, and when they came back... something had hurt them. Mettaton shouldn't have gone, because now he had to live that hell all over again. Frisk shouldn't have gone, because Asriel can see them barely holding themselves together after attacking each slaver without any mercy.

Asriel shouldn't have gone, because now all he can think about is the dark. The feeling of a rope around his snout, pulling his jaw tight never goes away. And he confronted his nightmares... only to find out that it didn't make a difference at all. That they only thing that changed was that he became worse. That he became broken and disgusting...

That he was never a person at all. Maybe he didn't even need to be collared and muzzled to realize that, but it was the truth.

Asriel goes silent as Mettaton apologizes. He can't think of any more empty words, anything else to offer because there was no comfort to give.

He wordlessly slumps against Mettaton, just staying there for a few long moments. He wants to cry, but he probably shouldn't.]

Mettaton...

I'm sorry too. I'm sorry for everything. I just can't... I can't pretend that it any of this was okay. I'm not even good at pretending that things are going to be okay.

Edited 2017-05-25 06:32 (UTC)

So don't. Let's...not do this today. I haven't the energy to lie.

[In that, at least, Mettaton was brutally honest. He'd just lost someone close to him. Even closer than Lucio had been. He can't pretend that it's fine, or that the situation will improve over time.

Still, his arm slowly pulls the young boss monster closer. Only just, though.]

[Asriel squeezes himself closer, no longer bothering with empty promises that everything's going to be all right.

He's not cut out for being an optimist, after all.]

Hey... let's make a dumb promise.

If or when the time comes that one of us has gotta leave, we'll come get the other, okay? And we'll take my transporter, and go as far as it can possibly go until we find a planet that's just for us. We'll take Frisk and Chara along too.

And... it'll be a nice planet, where we'll find all the people we miss. And we'll just... live there instead. And it'll have everything we could ever want on it.

[No such planet exists, and the both of them know it. It's a childish fantasy, but after everything that's happened... was it really that bad to just indulge in a some make-believe planet?]

[Mettaton struggles with that kind of thought. He's hardly keeping himself together at this point, with his SOUL hurting so much...]

Mmh...I would...not leave you behind if I could help it.

If we could do things that way, it would be nice.

[He doesn't believe it will ever work like that though. He's just not going to pretend that he does for Asriel's sake though. Because if one of them could be satisfied, then that would be enough.]

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