Asriel Dreemurr (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
pleasereset) wrote2017-05-28 09:51 pm
pleasereset) wrote2017-05-28 09:51 pm
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"Hello, this is Asriel! Leave a message and I'll get back to you as soon as I can!"
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"Hello, this is Asriel! Leave a message and I'll get back to you as soon as I can!"
IC Inbox for texting, video, voice, and action!
[Mettaton would usually play sympathetic here, assure Asriel that he knows the boy's love is unconditional and apportioned fairly. But he is going to be honest. If it hurts Asriel...well. It's not intentional. But it needs saying if Mettaton expects resolution before his death.]
I feel that neither can I. And yet they speak so coldly of me. They find the words to strike hardest. I just want you to know...and only you...I want you to realize that they are as complicit to this as I am.
I know that I am not perfect. As they're fond of reminding me, I treated your memorial in such an ignoble fashion, and I have hurt many people, including you. They are right when they insinuate that you are too good to waste time on a monster like me.
Even still...it does not make such statements hurt any less. But how could they know? Haha...the only Mettaton they know is the fool I once was. I suppose that is completely my fault. And I am not absolved...but at least I would think I earned respite. Perhaps not...
[Mettaton doesn't hide anymore. He speaks quietly, truthfully.]
I feel that neither can I. And yet they speak so coldly of me. They find the words to strike hardest. I just want you to know...and only you...I want you to realize that they are as complicit to this as I am.
I know that I am not perfect. As they're fond of reminding me, I treated your memorial in such an ignoble fashion, and I have hurt many people, including you. They are right when they insinuate that you are too good to waste time on a monster like me.
Even still...it does not make such statements hurt any less. But how could they know? Haha...the only Mettaton they know is the fool I once was. I suppose that is completely my fault. And I am not absolved...but at least I would think I earned respite. Perhaps not...
[Mettaton doesn't hide anymore. He speaks quietly, truthfully.]
[What did Mettaton want him to say? His fingers dig into the fabric of his sleeves, a lump in his throat. Should he say Chara wasn't the greatest person? Say it loud enough that they can hear him clearly this time? Because Frisk is the friend he wished he always had!
... He threw them away, in an attempt to move on. And he could never forget that. And neither could Chara. Chara heard every word, and Asriel could never take it back.
And here he was, struggling for the Right Words to say with his closest friend dying and confessing to him. And Asriel still couldn't think of anything to say, his mind crippled with thoughts about how at any given moment, the life will fade right out of Mettaton and he'll be left alone. If he waits long enough, he probably won't have to worry about an answer!
Ha... hahah.... hahahahaha-]
'm sorry... I-I don't... I don't know how to fix it...
They were... they were always really good at things like that...
... He threw them away, in an attempt to move on. And he could never forget that. And neither could Chara. Chara heard every word, and Asriel could never take it back.
And here he was, struggling for the Right Words to say with his closest friend dying and confessing to him. And Asriel still couldn't think of anything to say, his mind crippled with thoughts about how at any given moment, the life will fade right out of Mettaton and he'll be left alone. If he waits long enough, he probably won't have to worry about an answer!
Ha... hahah.... hahahahaha-]
'm sorry... I-I don't... I don't know how to fix it...
They were... they were always really good at things like that...
Don't try. You can't. And it is not your responsibility. Your responsibility, Asriel, is to your family. I am deeply respectful of your ties to Chara, and I am even more respectful of you. That's why I'm telling you this...but do not let it make you feel as if you must renege against your own sibling.
I cannot ask that of you.
[Not even when he want to tell Asriel that the reason he's like this is because he'd been holding everything in, so deeply that it penetrated his SOUL and began to eat it from the inside out. Because to monsters, cruel words cut as deeply as daggers. Losing your drive to live carved slivers of your well being away, shaving HP down to a fine, brittle point.
Ready to snap. No. Ready to disintegrate.
Sinners were never truly spared their transgressions. Throw a key to the depths. Abandon those whose happiness depended on you. Turn a sad, uncertain monster's plan over its end, making fun of her.
Murder a child, over and over. Do it until they win. Fight. FIGHT.
...He can't fight anymore. And for a moment, he feels as if he might go to pieces right there. Before he can stop himself, he articulates:]
It hurts.
I cannot ask that of you.
[Not even when he want to tell Asriel that the reason he's like this is because he'd been holding everything in, so deeply that it penetrated his SOUL and began to eat it from the inside out. Because to monsters, cruel words cut as deeply as daggers. Losing your drive to live carved slivers of your well being away, shaving HP down to a fine, brittle point.
Ready to snap. No. Ready to disintegrate.
Sinners were never truly spared their transgressions. Throw a key to the depths. Abandon those whose happiness depended on you. Turn a sad, uncertain monster's plan over its end, making fun of her.
Murder a child, over and over. Do it until they win. Fight. FIGHT.
...He can't fight anymore. And for a moment, he feels as if he might go to pieces right there. Before he can stop himself, he articulates:]
It hurts.
You are my family!
[Asriel leans forward, his head bent down. He places his face in his hands.]
Tell me how I can fix this, tell me what I need to do to stop this!
[His voice sounds pitiful and desperate.]
Please... don't tell me there's nothing I can do...
[Asriel leans forward, his head bent down. He places his face in his hands.]
Tell me how I can fix this, tell me what I need to do to stop this!
[His voice sounds pitiful and desperate.]
Please... don't tell me there's nothing I can do...
There is something you can do for me, darling.
[Mettaton's lips twitch upward, but his smile looks hollow.]
It is selfish, but I'll ask it of you anyway. Please keep me company until...well, until I have to leave. After all, that is all it is. Leaving for a little while, right?
[Leaving his friend. Leaving his family to mourn. He doesn't want to. He wishes he could take this all back, but that's impossible. A monster cannot be saved from falling down. Alphys had tried, and she had failed. He's not stupid enough to think anyone would care enough to try it with him, nor would he want them to.]
I won't ever really leave you, Asriel. I've grown so fond of our friendship, and if you can promise that you will never leave, then I, too, can promise it. It won't be forever.
Don't be sad, please? Let us do better than that.
[Mettaton's lips twitch upward, but his smile looks hollow.]
It is selfish, but I'll ask it of you anyway. Please keep me company until...well, until I have to leave. After all, that is all it is. Leaving for a little while, right?
[Leaving his friend. Leaving his family to mourn. He doesn't want to. He wishes he could take this all back, but that's impossible. A monster cannot be saved from falling down. Alphys had tried, and she had failed. He's not stupid enough to think anyone would care enough to try it with him, nor would he want them to.]
I won't ever really leave you, Asriel. I've grown so fond of our friendship, and if you can promise that you will never leave, then I, too, can promise it. It won't be forever.
Don't be sad, please? Let us do better than that.
[Asriel leans forward, leans far enough that he's leaning against him. Even if Mettaton can't move anymore, he doesn't have to be without any physical contact. He rubs at his face, trying to hold himself together.]
Of course... I'd never leave you.
[Asriel smiles weakly, but it's forced.]
Promise you'll come back soon. I'll wait for however long it takes.
Of course... I'd never leave you.
[Asriel smiles weakly, but it's forced.]
Promise you'll come back soon. I'll wait for however long it takes.
[God, Mettaton wishes he could feel it. He wants to feel in that way that only he can feel, which isn't necessarily the way normal people feel. He wants to move and hug his friend, but knows that he can't.
It hurts...it hurts so much that he cant, but he smiles in earnest, because from that, he can pull a positive.]
Thank you so much, Asriel. I would be so lost without you...
And when I come back, I am going to enjoy hugging you close. We can watch television, have sleepovers...anything you like. Perhaps soon, we can go back to our homes; wouldn't that be lovely?
It hurts...it hurts so much that he cant, but he smiles in earnest, because from that, he can pull a positive.]
Thank you so much, Asriel. I would be so lost without you...
And when I come back, I am going to enjoy hugging you close. We can watch television, have sleepovers...anything you like. Perhaps soon, we can go back to our homes; wouldn't that be lovely?
I'd be really lost without you too.
[He sounds so weepy. He hates it. He just wishes he could be the strong one for once.]
I'll be expecting a hug. And watching TV together... and sleepovers too. You can't back out of it, OK?
[He sounds so weepy. He hates it. He just wishes he could be the strong one for once.]
I'll be expecting a hug. And watching TV together... and sleepovers too. You can't back out of it, OK?
All of it, many times over. It has been too long since we have enjoyed each other's company for the sake of it.
We have to change that.
[He has to change it. Something has to give, or he would only waste away upon coming back, if he even came back. Because he still doesn't have total faith that everything will fall into place so easily for him.
Then again, it's hard to have faith when he's like this. He just wants to...well. He wants to sleep. It's uncomfortable, because Mettaton physically never sleeps, but he's exhausted.]
I'll cook your favorite foods, too. I promise.
[Yeah. Focus on positive things. He can do it. He can...]
We have to change that.
[He has to change it. Something has to give, or he would only waste away upon coming back, if he even came back. Because he still doesn't have total faith that everything will fall into place so easily for him.
Then again, it's hard to have faith when he's like this. He just wants to...well. He wants to sleep. It's uncomfortable, because Mettaton physically never sleeps, but he's exhausted.]
I'll cook your favorite foods, too. I promise.
[Yeah. Focus on positive things. He can do it. He can...]
That'd be... that'd be really nice, Mettaton.
[Geez, he's starting to tear up again. He really wants that though. He's kind of always wanted that. No dangerous planets, no paranoia about shady people looking at you as if they want to steal you away the moment you let your guard drop, no scary fog or weird dreams...
Just them. Staying up late and talking about something other than how hopeless it all was to try making a new life here.
It's not like those fears or paranoid would go away that easily, but...]
We could stay up late and watch really silly movies.
... When you come back, we'll make it better. I'll... I'll try harder to, to be better.
[Geez, he's starting to tear up again. He really wants that though. He's kind of always wanted that. No dangerous planets, no paranoia about shady people looking at you as if they want to steal you away the moment you let your guard drop, no scary fog or weird dreams...
Just them. Staying up late and talking about something other than how hopeless it all was to try making a new life here.
It's not like those fears or paranoid would go away that easily, but...]
We could stay up late and watch really silly movies.
... When you come back, we'll make it better. I'll... I'll try harder to, to be better.
we're still in region five, but we're getting ready to leave soon.
what is going on? chara won't say anything except something about going on vacation
what is going on? chara won't say anything except something about going on vacation
Approaching fog.
Implied connection: viral threat.
Implied connection: viral threat.
[Coming back from the dead had been just as discomforting as the very first time he'd experienced it. And just like the last time, he was loathe to be seen by pretty much anyone the way he was. There were so few who understood what they were looking at, and he sorely hopes that anyone who might have found it out no longer remembered.
Except Asriel...because he's perfectly comfortable showing the most hated part of himself. Which is, ironically, himself.
And yet, he finds himself secreting away behind the young boss monster from time to time, aywhere but Rinzler's home, of course. The program probably had a way to tell that Mettaton was lurking.
Here, in the light of the afternoon, Mettaton's transparent form blends a bit. But in the shade...the pink is unmistakable.
So he endeavors to avoid shade.
For a while, he trails after Asriel, slowly approaching the boss monster. Closer and closer, but his cowardice doesn't let him call out for a very, very long time.
He doesn't even know how long it is before he finally floats close to Asriel's side, quietly murmuring the kid's name in his voice. The voice that's not him.]
Asriel...?
Except Asriel...because he's perfectly comfortable showing the most hated part of himself. Which is, ironically, himself.
And yet, he finds himself secreting away behind the young boss monster from time to time, aywhere but Rinzler's home, of course. The program probably had a way to tell that Mettaton was lurking.
Here, in the light of the afternoon, Mettaton's transparent form blends a bit. But in the shade...the pink is unmistakable.
So he endeavors to avoid shade.
For a while, he trails after Asriel, slowly approaching the boss monster. Closer and closer, but his cowardice doesn't let him call out for a very, very long time.
He doesn't even know how long it is before he finally floats close to Asriel's side, quietly murmuring the kid's name in his voice. The voice that's not him.]
Asriel...?
[Asriel's days hadn't gone any better since Mettaton's death. Chara nearly died, Asriel had lost sight in his left eye, and it was only because of Shiro that neither one of them ended up as lunch for two giant spiders. After returning home, he made sure to keep checking up on Mettaton's body. It took some help, but he managed to get it moved to a nearby couch so that whenever Mettaton did come back, he wouldn't have to come back to his body abandoned and forgotten in a corner.
There wasn't really much to do outside, other than Asriel getting some fresh air and trying to sort out his thoughts. Tomorrow, he'd probably go to that planet full of Programs and AI. Maybe he'd... actually fit in there?
Like he fits in anywhere anymore.
The voice from behind startles him out of his thoughts, enough for him to let out a surprised squeak. It's familiar, but it's been a while since Asriel's heard that voice, so it's hard to place it at first. He turns suddenly, catching a faint shade of pink...]
Mettaton-!
[Is it him? It's hard to see him at first, especially out of a bad eye. But he turns quickly, and it's not a pretty sight. White fur is missing on the left side of his face, replaced by an pink splotchiness where it looked like something was thrown and splattered across his face. He opens his left eye, and there's an unusual glossiness to it that shouldn't be there.
When he speaks again, he sounds a little desperate.]
Mettaton, is that you...?
There wasn't really much to do outside, other than Asriel getting some fresh air and trying to sort out his thoughts. Tomorrow, he'd probably go to that planet full of Programs and AI. Maybe he'd... actually fit in there?
Like he fits in anywhere anymore.
The voice from behind startles him out of his thoughts, enough for him to let out a surprised squeak. It's familiar, but it's been a while since Asriel's heard that voice, so it's hard to place it at first. He turns suddenly, catching a faint shade of pink...]
Mettaton-!
[Is it him? It's hard to see him at first, especially out of a bad eye. But he turns quickly, and it's not a pretty sight. White fur is missing on the left side of his face, replaced by an pink splotchiness where it looked like something was thrown and splattered across his face. He opens his left eye, and there's an unusual glossiness to it that shouldn't be there.
When he speaks again, he sounds a little desperate.]
Mettaton, is that you...?
[Oh...oh no.]
Asriel, honey...your eye!
[If there was any doubt as to whether this was Mettaton, it's erased by how he frets over the young boss monster before him, floating forward and reaching a nubby digit out towards the injury.]
What happened?!
[Mettaton isn't important right now. He'd died, and he had already squared with it. But Asriel had been hurt somehow...
You weren't there]
Asriel, honey...your eye!
[If there was any doubt as to whether this was Mettaton, it's erased by how he frets over the young boss monster before him, floating forward and reaching a nubby digit out towards the injury.]
What happened?!
[Mettaton isn't important right now. He'd died, and he had already squared with it. But Asriel had been hurt somehow...
You weren't there]
[Asriel can't see it when Mettaton reaches out towards his eye, but his worry doesn't stop the relieved smile threatening to spread across Asriel's face. His eyes feel a little watery.
He's back. He really didn't disappear forever...
But ah... he noticed his eye. Of course he would, it's impossible to hide it. Asriel's tried.]
Me and Chara ran into some giant spiders that spit poison. The spiders almost won. Chara got hurt real bad and one of 'em spit something in my eye...
[He can't help himself. Asriel reaches out to try and hug the ghost.]
But more importantly, you're back! I missed you so much...
He's back. He really didn't disappear forever...
But ah... he noticed his eye. Of course he would, it's impossible to hide it. Asriel's tried.]
Me and Chara ran into some giant spiders that spit poison. The spiders almost won. Chara got hurt real bad and one of 'em spit something in my eye...
[He can't help himself. Asriel reaches out to try and hug the ghost.]
But more importantly, you're back! I missed you so much...
Edited 2017-06-14 06:53 (UTC)
Of course I'm back, I asked you to wait for me, didn't I? So I wouldn't dare keep you waiting for long.
[Mettaton would address the spider encounter later. For now, he was going to let Asriel attempt to hug him all he likes. Unfortunately, he's very intangible, so unless Asriel uses his own magical influence, he won't be touching much.
Mettaton, for his part, is still getting used to this...again...]
I'm sorry I didn't say anything, I've been following you for a little while, but...
[Haha. What does he even say?]
[Mettaton would address the spider encounter later. For now, he was going to let Asriel attempt to hug him all he likes. Unfortunately, he's very intangible, so unless Asriel uses his own magical influence, he won't be touching much.
Mettaton, for his part, is still getting used to this...again...]
I'm sorry I didn't say anything, I've been following you for a little while, but...
[Haha. What does he even say?]
I know, but... it was tough waiting anyway.
[Mettaton had said it himself, hadn't he? Sometimes you just. Disappear.
Still, ineffective as it might be, he's still gonna try clinging to him. He can't actually feel anything there physically, but it doesn't seem to be stopping him.]
You were following me? ... Why?
[Mettaton knows Asriel doesn't care what form he's in, he's just happy that he's come back.]
[Mettaton had said it himself, hadn't he? Sometimes you just. Disappear.
Still, ineffective as it might be, he's still gonna try clinging to him. He can't actually feel anything there physically, but it doesn't seem to be stopping him.]
You were following me? ... Why?
[Mettaton knows Asriel doesn't care what form he's in, he's just happy that he's come back.]
I don't know. I know you've seen me this way, so that is not the problem.
I...mmh.
[The small ghost eventually backs out of Asriel's attempts to hug him, and there's a distinctly faded appearance to him, even more than usual. Mettaton hates it. It's a sign of apprehension in ghost monsters, and it's pretty...well, to feed the stereotype, transparent.]
It's foolish. But I don't...wish to go back to my body just yet? Of course, it's twice as stupid if one considers the fact that I also hate being a ghost. It's terrible! This isn't who I am! But the truth is, honey, I don't know who I'm supposed to be either.
So I suppose the short of it is...I didn't want to disappoint you.
[He fades out, just a bit more. He's so selfish, coming back immediately and wanting Asriel to take on the burden of his own crisis of identity. Stupid Mettaton. Stupid stupid stupid.]
I...mmh.
[The small ghost eventually backs out of Asriel's attempts to hug him, and there's a distinctly faded appearance to him, even more than usual. Mettaton hates it. It's a sign of apprehension in ghost monsters, and it's pretty...well, to feed the stereotype, transparent.]
It's foolish. But I don't...wish to go back to my body just yet? Of course, it's twice as stupid if one considers the fact that I also hate being a ghost. It's terrible! This isn't who I am! But the truth is, honey, I don't know who I'm supposed to be either.
So I suppose the short of it is...I didn't want to disappoint you.
[He fades out, just a bit more. He's so selfish, coming back immediately and wanting Asriel to take on the burden of his own crisis of identity. Stupid Mettaton. Stupid stupid stupid.]
[Asriel watches fearfully as he starts fading. Is he doing it again? Is he saying the wrong things?]
No! I'd never be disappointed, no matter how you came back! I don't - I don't care what body you come back in or if you don't want to come back as a robot I just-
I care about you.
[Asriel clams up again, afraid that he might've said too much. Too many wrong things.]
Please just... stay?
No! I'd never be disappointed, no matter how you came back! I don't - I don't care what body you come back in or if you don't want to come back as a robot I just-
I care about you.
[Asriel clams up again, afraid that he might've said too much. Too many wrong things.]
Please just... stay?
That's what you want?
[Mettaton's pupil-less eye affixes to Asriel's face, and he's so guilty...]
Haha, I do believe you. I just wish that I could cease to be a burden. It is nice to be cared about, though.
[The color starts to come back, with Mettaton's will to stay. He can't stop himself from crying a little, though. He'd been holding himself back for so long, he's been in tears ever since he came back.]
Happy thoughts...we need to be happy. We talked about it, right? Doing happy things and keeping an eye on each other. I...suppose it's literal now, since between us both, we've got full range of vision.
[Asriel's left and his right. It really is a little funny, if it wasn't also very sad. Mettaton had always been sightless in his right (save for the rare moment when his vision was properly split in his box form amongst the squares), but Asriel was probably not familiar with having a blind eye.]
[Mettaton's pupil-less eye affixes to Asriel's face, and he's so guilty...]
Haha, I do believe you. I just wish that I could cease to be a burden. It is nice to be cared about, though.
[The color starts to come back, with Mettaton's will to stay. He can't stop himself from crying a little, though. He'd been holding himself back for so long, he's been in tears ever since he came back.]
Happy thoughts...we need to be happy. We talked about it, right? Doing happy things and keeping an eye on each other. I...suppose it's literal now, since between us both, we've got full range of vision.
[Asriel's left and his right. It really is a little funny, if it wasn't also very sad. Mettaton had always been sightless in his right (save for the rare moment when his vision was properly split in his box form amongst the squares), but Asriel was probably not familiar with having a blind eye.]
[Asriel nods, a little desperately.]
No more family leaving, please...
[He almost lost Chara. He always feels like he's on the verge of losing them all, being left all alone.
His lower lip quivers and his eyes are watering. He bites his lip and his attempt to not cry almost comes off as comical.]
I'd like that... though just seeing out of one eye is kind of- [stressful] -weird. I think I can get used to it... until I can get it fixed.
No more family leaving, please...
[He almost lost Chara. He always feels like he's on the verge of losing them all, being left all alone.
His lower lip quivers and his eyes are watering. He bites his lip and his attempt to not cry almost comes off as comical.]
I'd like that... though just seeing out of one eye is kind of- [stressful] -weird. I think I can get used to it... until I can get it fixed.
I'm sure it can be fixed somehow. After all, you have already been changed once, unless we're going with the story that your tail just had an irregular growth spurt.
[Jokes? Are we making jokes now?
Yes, well, it's better than panicking over being a ghost and yet not wanting to be a robot. Happy mediums for everyone!
Still, he can't ignore the crying.]
...Asriel, I'll never leave by choice, you know that right? I'm not at all interested in leaving you behind. [Not forever.] I suppose this is all a wake up call, isn't it? For me, I mean.
[Jokes? Are we making jokes now?
Yes, well, it's better than panicking over being a ghost and yet not wanting to be a robot. Happy mediums for everyone!
Still, he can't ignore the crying.]
...Asriel, I'll never leave by choice, you know that right? I'm not at all interested in leaving you behind. [Not forever.] I suppose this is all a wake up call, isn't it? For me, I mean.
[The joke earns a small chuckle, and it's the closest thing to a laugh that Asriel's had in a long time.]
No, it's not a growth spurt...
[He smiles a little.]
I could probably ask Clu. He's really smart, he fixed my chest when it was turning to glass way back in July.
[He rubs at his eyes, but when Mettaton continues it's hard for them not to start watering a little again.]
Mm... I... I wouldn't leave you either. [Despite his plan earlier that he was going to replace himself. Mettaton, Chara, and Frisk... they couldn't possibly want this broken, ugly version of him. Do they?]
I really want you to stay.
No, it's not a growth spurt...
[He smiles a little.]
I could probably ask Clu. He's really smart, he fixed my chest when it was turning to glass way back in July.
[He rubs at his eyes, but when Mettaton continues it's hard for them not to start watering a little again.]
Mm... I... I wouldn't leave you either. [Despite his plan earlier that he was going to replace himself. Mettaton, Chara, and Frisk... they couldn't possibly want this broken, ugly version of him. Do they?]
I really want you to stay.
So stay I shall.
[Mettaton floats closer, hesitantly, then closes the remainder of the distance between them and leans against Asriel. This time, there's a faint solidity as he uses his magic to give him the ability to touch. He can't feel it, really. But he can touch.]
Mm, Clu? I feel as if I should be far more familiar with him than I am. Still, I ought to be grateful he helped you, and if you think he can help you again, then you should ask. Whatever can help you heal.
[Mettaton floats closer, hesitantly, then closes the remainder of the distance between them and leans against Asriel. This time, there's a faint solidity as he uses his magic to give him the ability to touch. He can't feel it, really. But he can touch.]
Mm, Clu? I feel as if I should be far more familiar with him than I am. Still, I ought to be grateful he helped you, and if you think he can help you again, then you should ask. Whatever can help you heal.
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